Allie woke up in the morning, Jacob’s arm still curled around her. She slowly moved out of bed so as not to wake him, and tip toed down the hall way to the bathroom. After splashing cold water on her face, she caught a glimpse of her bottom in the mirror on her way out. She gasped, reaching back to touch the marks on her typically white bottom, reminders of the night before. She stared at them for a moment before a smile spread across her lips. She couldn’t quite figure out why, but there was something about those marks that were incredibly sexy. Allie made her way back to bed, and slipped back under the covers, kissing the sides of Jacob’s face until he woke up.
He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and smiled at her. “Good morning beautiful,” he murmured.
“Good morning to you,” she grinned. “So I was thinking, that we should have a picnic today.”
Jacob laughed. “You’re in a good mood today,”
She shrugged, blushing. “It’s because of last night, all of it.” she took a moment, then continued. “Besides, it’s a really nice day out, a perfect day for a picnic!” she wriggled closer to him, pressing her body against his naked skin, soaking up the warmth of his body.
He turned to her, wrapping his arm around her and kissing her deeply. “Mmm, you’re not motivating me to get out of bed at all today. I think we should just stay here and make love all day.”
Allie smiled. “Well, you’re the boss. Whatever you say,” she giggled, leaning in and kissing him again.
He rolled over, bringing himself to kneel over her, and starting at her collar bone, trailed kisses down her chest and belly, pausing between her legs. He paid special attention to this area, breathing hot on her thighs, making her shiver as his lips touched her. He worked until she was feverish with desire, begging him to take her. Finally, he slid easily into her, eliciting a growl. He made love to her until they were both exhausted, then collapsed beside her. After taking a few moments to catch her breath, Allie rolled over, propping herself up on his chest. “Let’s go take a shower and I’ll pack a basket for our picnic?” she grinned.
Unable to help himself, a wide smile spread across his face and he chuckled. “Okay sweetheart. We’ll have a picnic,” he agreed, leaning closer in to kiss her.
Excitedly, she jumped up and out of bed, Jacob moving much more slowly behind her. As he was sitting up, she was bounding across the room to gather clean clothes for the day. He caught sight of her marked bottom, and his breath froze in his chest. “Allie,” he breathed softly.
She turned to look at him, and immediately knew something was wrong.
His eyes were wide and he was pale, a horrified look on his face.
Worried, Allie rushed over to him. “Jacob, what’s the matter? Are you alright?” she asked frantically.
“Your bottom,” he said quietly. He opened his mouth to continue but didn’t know what to say.
Relieved, Allie dismissed his concern with a wave of the hand. “Oh, that?” she scoffed. “I thought something was wrong.”
“Something is wrong.” he replied.
“I didn’t mean to … I didn’t think that I was spanking you that hard. I really think we should reconsider this.” he said firmly. “I don’t want to spank you any more, Allison.”
Allie felt like her heart was going to explode. Her chest got tight and tears welled in her eyes. “What? Why!?” she demanded.
“Because I hurt you. I left marks on you, and I didn’t even realize what I was doing. I don’t trust myself not to do that again.” he explained. He looked like he might be sick. “I’m so sorry, Allie. I never meant to do that,”
Coming to his side, she took his face in her hands, and kissed him softly. “You didn’t hurt me, Jacob. It’s okay, really. Marks are going to happen sometimes .. I kind of like them, actually.” she whispered.
He shook his head vehemently. “No. I don’t like them.”
Suddenly, Allie became furious. Things had been going so well between the two of them. They were closer than ever, the sex was better than ever, and the spankings were the reason for all the good changes in their relationship. How could he want to just throw that away? She kicked the laundry basket that was beside her, sending clothes flying all over the room, her eyes fiery when she looked at him. “I can’t believe you’re doing this. You cant just give up!”
“I can.” he said quietly. “And I am. I refuse to hurt you Allie.”
She let out a frustrated scream and stormed out of the room and into the bathroom. Slamming the door behind her, she locked herself in, and turned on the shower. The room quickly filled with steam as Allie stood beneath the hot water, tears streaming down her face. She didn’t understand. How could he not have expected that sooner or later he was going to leave a damn mark on her? It wasn’t a big deal! She liked it, why didn’t he get it?
While Allie cried alone in the shower, Jacob sat motionless on their bed, feeling like he’d been sucker punched in the gut. What he didn’t tell Allie, was that he was going to miss it, too. He’d seen the benefits, relished the changes spanking had brought about, especially in her. Why couldn’t she just understand that nothing was worth harming her? Seeing bruises on her skin made him sick to his stomach. He had never meant to hurt her, couldn’t stand the thought of leaving marks on her precious body, caused by his own hand. If he hadn’t known last night that he was spanking hard enough to leave marks, what’s to say that it would never happen again? He couldn’t take the chance. Now he had to deal with his guilt for marking her, and the pain of having her be so angry with him. He slowly rose from the bed and made his way down the hall to the bathroom, knocking sharply on the door.
She heard the knocks but purposefully ignored them. She had nothing to say to him.
He knocked again, louder this time. “Allie,” he called.
“GO AWAY!” she yelled.
Jacob sighed, and went back to the bedroom. He got dressed and went to sit in the living room. Eventually, she’d have to come out.
He was right. She did have to come out sometime, but she took her sweet time doing it. She blow-dried her hair, brushed her teeth, put on make-up and lotioned her whole body before coming out of the bathroom. Then she went to their room and locked herself in there while she dressed. Finally, she had nothing left to do and she grew bored, so she came out to the living room where he was waiting.
“Let’s talk, please.” he suggested when she came out.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” she snapped.
“Don’t do that.” he ordered. “Just because I’m not going to spank you, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t still be respectful.”
“What, exactly, is there to respect?”
His eyes were sad, and Allie immediately felt bad for saying it. He went on anyway. “I am sorry that you’re hurt by my decision. I’m only doing what I feel is best for us, don’t you see that? I’m not comfortable with knowing that I did that to you, and I had no idea. I don’t want to leave marks on you, you’re the woman I love more than anyone or anything in the whole world.”
“Please don’t do this,” Allie begged, her voice barely audible.
His heart was breaking. He could see how much distress this was causing her. “Allie,” he sighed.
“No, you don’t understand, Jake. I need this, don’t you see that? Haven’t you noticed the changes in me lately, in our relationship? I’ve been so much happier, so much less stressed out and much more comfortable in my own skin. I’ve been more respectful because you gave me a reason to respect you instead of letting me walk all over you and treating me like some sort of princess. I am not a princess, and I don’t need to be treated as such. I knew going into this that there was a chance that I’d end up with some bruises and marks. It’s going to happen, even when you’re trying not to. And I bet there’s times that even if you were to try to leave marks, you wouldn’t be able to. I just think you’re giving up too easily.”
“Of course I’ve noticed the changes, and I realize that my taking on this new role is the cause for those changes. Don’t you think that we could carry on the dynamic without the spankings?” he suggested.
Tears filled Allie’s eyes. “I don’t want to give them up, Jake. Please,”
He shook his head in disbelief. “I never would have imagine there’d come a day when you’d be begging me to spank you. I don’t want to hurt you, Allie.”
“You didn’t hurt me. And you won’t hurt me,” she whispered. “I need this, Jake. I really do.” She moved next to him and took his hand. “I know it’s scary, and it’s hard, for both of us. But it’s doing us too much good for me to let you give up this easily.”
He looked her in the eye. “I am the leader in this relationship. I understand that you don’t want to give up the spankings, but I do. My job is to take your opinions into consideration, but when push comes to shove, the final decision is mine. I have to make the choice that I feel is best for the both of us. I’m sorry, Allie, but I’ve made my decision. We’re not going to do spankings anymore.”
Allison hung her head, realizing he was right. She’d asked him to be the leader, and that meant that she had to accept the decisions he made for them, even when she didn’t completely agree with them. It was inevitable for them to come across things that they weren’t going to see eye to eye on, wasn’t that the point of their arrangement? She nodded. “Okay,” she said softly, the tears streaming down her face.
He reached over and wiped the tears from her cheek. “I love you Allison, please don’t be upset about this. You’ll see. Things are going to be okay.” he assured her.
She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. She couldn’t see how things were going to be okay. She already was feeling uneasy, and she wondered how he planned to keep the dynamic alive without the spankings.
“Hey,” he said, lifting her chin with his finger, then kissed her forehead. “I promise.”
Sitting in the sun on a picnic blanket, Allie stared at Jacob through her oversized sunglasses. There were so many things she wanted to say, but knew it just wasn’t her place. Despite Jacob’s assurances, she felt betrayed. She didn’t want things to change. This left her in a bad mood, extremely cranky.
Jacob wasn’t feeling very happy either. He really felt that he was making the right choice, but he couldn’t stand seeing Allie so sad. She hadn’t really spoken much since he’d made the decision to cut spankings out of their relationship. He didn’t know what to do. “Allie, can you hand me the bag of chips from the basket?” he asked.
Silently, she reached inside their picnic basket and grabbed the bag of chips, passing them to him. She didn’t look at him as she extended her arm and once he’d taken the bag, she drew back again.
“Are you okay honey?” he asked.
She nodded, still saying nothing.
“Talk to me.” he said quietly.
Allie just shook her head, having nothing to say. She literally could think of nothing.
He took her hand. “Allison, you will not withdraw from me. I know this is hard, but we’re going to have to get through it together.”
The tears welled in her eyes again, though she still could not formulate sentences, she looked up and met his eye, pleading with her expression. She opened her mouth to try to speak, but nothing came, and she just shook her head, looking away. After a long, painful silence, she whispered, “I know it’s only been a few weeks since we started this, but I can’t imagine our lives without…” she stopped, shaking her head. “I know I asked you to take charge and be the leader. That means I’m supposed to accept the decisions you make for us, whether I agree with them or not. But this … I just … Jacob, this is something I feel that I really really need. I know you already said you made your decision, and if it’s what you really think is best for us, then fine, I’ll learn to live with it. All I’m asking you is to PLEASE, please thing about it. I know it’s hard to see me cry, and it’s hard to see marks on my body but I promise you, it’s what I want and need.” she pleaded. “Please. Just think about it.”
Looking at her, he could see that she was seriously distressed about this. He sighed, and nodded. “I’ll think more about it, but I can’t promise that I’m going to change my mind. Until I bring it up again, I don’t want to hear anymore about it. You’ve shared your opinion and I am going to seriously consider all sides of the situation, but from here on out, the rest is up to me. I don’t want to be bombarded with pleas to change my mind. Do you understand?”
She nodded meekly. Hard as it was for her to accept, this was it. She’d presented her case and bared her soul, and Jacob now had the difficult task of making a decision based on her feelings and his own. She had to come to terms with the fact that the spanking aspect of their relationship could be over for good, and if that’s what he decided, she had to be okay with it. She wasn’t sure if she could do that, but she was going to try. All she really wanted was to please Jacob.
